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The Tale of Tucker Carlson’s New Career
A White Paint Adventure
Once upon a time, In a small rural American town that was home to apple pie, guns, and mom was a paint company. It was a company like no other, offering a single hue of paint — white. The company, called “Solely White,” soon gained national attention when they announced the hiring of their new Quality Assurance Director: none other than Tucker Carlson himself.
Tucker Carlson, the beloved, yet controversial, TV personality, known for his fiery political debates and trademark bowtie, had decided to leave the world of television to pursue his true passion: watching paint dry. It was a bold move for the former news anchor, but a decision that he firmly stood by. When asked why he joined Solely White, Carlson enthusiastically exclaimed, “White is my favorite color!”
Upon further investigation, it became apparent that Tucker’s passion for white paint was not only limited to its drying process. He strongly advocated for the hue, believing it was the most superior color in the paint spectrum. “White paint is pure, clean, and bright,” Carlson argued, “and it symbolizes so many positive things — like the American dream!”
Carlson’s dedication to the cause was evident as he embarked on his new role as Quality Assurance Director. In a surprisingly inspiring move, he set up…
